Happy New Year

Well 2009 is DONE and OVER-WITH... and all I can say about it is "Buh-Bye". I really want (need) 2010 to be better and I realized today that the only way that is going to happen is if I make it better. I just want the wisdom and strength to not make the same mistakes all over again and the courage to make the changes that need to be made.

2010 is a BIG year for me , in May I will turn "The Big 4-0" and I think it is high-time I grew up and actually did something with my life. Yeah, yeah... I know I am a "mom" and all that stuff , but everything I do is for everyone else. I need to take care of myself mentally and physically in order to even be around for everyone. I have to be able to believe in myself that "yes, I CAN do it". I need to learn to pick my "battles" not to freak-out at every little thing , let some stuff go... but really put my foot down on others. I realize that I do that alot with everything/everyone in my life and not just my kids and husband. So here is my list of aspirations for 2010 ( notice I didn't say "resolutions" , I don't like that word)

• Get "healthy" and lose at least 40lbs by my 40th Birthday (May 29th)
• Take some sort of class, need to get my brain back in action and try to decide on a "Career Path" ( I know I am 39yrs old, but I have been a SAHM for the last 17yrs that was my "career")
• Complete household projects ( that is a whole list all on it's own)
• Be a better mom, wife, sister , daughter, and friend ( I have to learn not to take everything to heart, my heart is heavy enough and I don't need to add more then is already there. I am grateful for all the wonderful people in my life ....old and new)
• Pay Bills "on-time" ( I know it sounds stupid, but I have really been bad lately with that one)
• Take control of our finances ( spending is getting out of control we don't save)
• Take my blog to a new level ( more vlogging, stick to a design, get buttons , keep up on writing and reading )
• Make more time/memories with my kids ( time is just flying by and before I know it my oldest will be off to college, we need to spend more time together as a "family")
• Be better organized ( get on husband that we really need to clean out the clutter in the house, it is suffocating me )

Well that is it , at least that my brain can think of right now.... it is enough to get me started.

Happy New Year, 2010 is going to be freaking awesome!

Wordless Wednesday ( Elf Style )

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

To Do Tuesday

I feel so "out of sorts" this Holiday Season and really had to muster up the energy to even do this post. I figured maybe if I did it, it would give me the boost(or should I say "kick-in-the-ass") I need to get out of this funk and get my act together!

• Take down all the Christmas Decorations ( not sure what day I will actually do this, it will depend on if my family comes to my house for my nephew's birthday party this weekend. if they do I will wait til after they leave to take it all down. But we are supposed to have "snow showers" all weekend, so I don't know........ )
• Must, Must catch up on my blog reading and start tweeting again. ( I have been such a slacker , and really didn't want to tweet in my "state of mind".... I felt like all I was doing was complaining and that just doesn't help me or anyone else )
• Make my "Winter Project Lists". ( this will probably be a post all on it's own, maybe when I get it done I will post it separately)
• Get out all my Weight Watchers stuff ( this will probably not start until Jan. 2nd again depending on the birthday party situation)
• Pay Bills ( an other chore I have neglected....sorry Allstate, and most of my credit cards)
• Figure out who on the PTO is in charge of the Family Winter Dance on Jan. 22nd and light a fire under her ASS ( cuz after the stress of the Holiday Store , I gladly pass the torch of this event on to someone else for a change. although I did make sure the DJ was available and already emailed the Treasurer to cut the girl a check.)
• Go see Alvin and The Chipmunks "The Squeakquel" ( OMG...... I can't friggin wait and neither can Thomas. Those little dudes are soo damn cute!)

Well I guess that is it for now........ This meme thingy is brought to you by Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting. Go check out her list ( she is an awesome mom ) and all the others who join in and maybe you will want to get all organized for the New Year too. Happy Holidays Happy Tuesday Thanks xoxoxo

Merry Christmas

This is the only Christmas image I could find to describe how my Christmas Eve is headed.......RIGHT DOWN THE TOILET!!

Hopefully Christmas morning with my family will be fine.....

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

Six Word Saturday

"I'm tired, is it over yet?"Wow, I can't believe it is Saturday again already. It has been a crazy busy week and seems that there is no end in sight to the madness. I guess I will relax in 2010. (yeah, right who am I kidding?) For my bloggy friends who live here on the East Coast we are all preparing to be snowed-in this weekend. I need to be snowed-in to catch up on household chores. If you want "in" on this very easy and fun Meme go check out ShowMyFace.com for how others describe their Saturday (or week) in "Six Words"

Wordless Wednesday

The VanDeusen Christmas Photo 2009

Happy Holidays

Love

Tina, Chris, Nicholas and Thomas

To Do Tuesday

Once again it is an insanely busy week around here and what makes it worse, is I am not really "into" this Holiday Season. Every year it gets harder and harder, and you would think with my kids getting older it would be easier. I keep thinking to myself "next year has to be better, less stressful" NOPE... seems there is always extra BULLSHIT added to the normal stress of the Holidays. So like every year I have to suck-it-up , smile and just get through it!

This week will consist of

* cleaning, laundry, shopping, cooking, wrapping, running the Holiday Store at my son's school on Wed. and Thurs. (set up for it is today at 3pm for about 2hrs, hopefully it will only take 2hrs. Not sure who, if anyone will show up to help me.) drinking (and yes, I mean the ALCOHOL kind of drinking) eating. Oh, I am going to attempt to bake something (just one batch of something from scratch, not Pilsbury or Betty Crocker) As if it wasn't enough my mom decided we are going to celebrate my niece's birthday before Christmas at my brother's house ( my niece's birthday is Dec 20th , my nephew's is Jan. 1) yes, my sister is a big pain in our asses! giving birth to both of her children 1 week before and one week after Christmas. We normally do both of their birthdays on New Years Day. Not sure why mom decided to add to all the madness!!??

I am too lazy and stressed to make my list all "organized" but I think you get the gist of it.

If you want to do a "To Do Tuesday" list too, or just go check out it's crazy founder.... head over and see Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting.

Thanks

Six Word Saturday

"Gettin My Ass Ready For Christmas" Now you know how I am "describing my life in Six Words" go check out ShowMyFace.com to see how others do it. Or maybe you want to join in on the Meme fun and link up yourself, go ahead........... I dare you to try it (hey, that was six words) LOL

Wordless Wednesday

My gorgeous grandson Tyler

just turned 5 months old this weekend

for more Wordless Wednesday posts/pictures head over to 5 Minutes For Mom.

To Do Tuesday

My head is spinning and I'm just going to go right into my list.....no witty story, no nothing. I am too busy to think of it or type it. All the anxiety over Christmas coming and this damn Holiday Store at my son's school, it's kinda takin' over right now. So if you want to get "in" on this crazy list-making meme go check out Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting and join in on the To-Do obsession.

Here we go.........

#1- Shop ( I am kinda freaking out about not having much done at all )

#2- Holiday Store ( make up flyers, buy last minute items, make up the schedule, go through the 4 giant boxes that arrived at my house yesterday...... UGH )

#3- Christmas Cards (take the boys picture, and start addressing them)

#4- Grocery list/coupon/dinner menu

#5- Pay bills

I can't even think of what else I have to do besides cleaning, laundry but I am sure there is 10 more things that will come up.

Thanks

xoxo

Remembering My Big Brother

Today is my oldest brother Andrew's Birthday, he would have been 46 years old. He was 20 when he was killed in a car accident on September 9th , 1984. I was 14 and was just about to start my Freshmen year of High School. Some days it seems like it was just yesterday and I can remember vividly that my friends were all sleeping over and he came into the den before he went out to say "bye". It was always a comforting memory for me, my girlfriend's and I were joking around and playing with a box of Barbie's we found in the closet. When he opened the door to say he was leaving , he caught us "playing Barbie". It was hysterical and embarrassing all at the same time.
To this day I wonder what would have become of him and our family if he was still here. My mother says she can't go there, but I just can't help it sometimes.

Happy Birthday Andrew.... Miss and Love You Always

Thanks
xoxo

Award, Award

Awwww.... I am soo honored I got this Award twice in one day. One from my buddy Robin over at Masshole Mommy (for Tina's Decor and More ) and the other from Freddae at Coffee God and Me ( for this blog). I am sooo cheating and just doing the same post on both blogs. Jeez, I hope I am not breaking any laws or anything! The "strings" attached with getting this Award is that you have to say 5 things you like to do and then pass this on to 5 friends.

These are the 5 things I like to do:

#1. Decorating , looking at home decor in stores and magazines..... ( now I just need an endless supply of $$ to make it all happen)

#2. Hanging out with my friends ( all of them, real-life friends and my online-friends )

#3. Laugh, I just love to laugh !!

#4. Be with my family ( Guess this should have been #1, but whatcanIsay... not loving them all right at this moment)

#5. Watching TV ( I know it is lame....but I just love my tv. Reality show junkie, HGTV fanatic and any Cop drama )

Now these are the 5 friends I am sending this award to:

#1. Cheryl at The Budge Bunch ( cuz she is one of my "real-life" BFF's and "online" BFF we have the best of both worlds )


#2. Kate at Busted Plumbing ( cuz she is handling her infertility with grace and humor )


#3. Ryan at For The Birds ( cuz she is the "Best" and I just loved how excited she got when I gave her an award before )


#4. Mary at Pajamas and Coffee ( OMG, cuz she is just tooo freaking hysterical )

#5. Last but not least I give this award to Mrs. Blogs Alot . ( cuz we are new friends and reading one of her posts encouraged a good "cleanse" that I much needed)
So go check out these awesome friends of mine!!
Thanks
xoxo

Six Word Saturday

I have been struggling all morning trying to come up with a post to do, and had no idea where to start. I really just wanted to make it so my "Bitchin and Moanin" post wasn't sitting there all weekend. I am sooo thankful and touched by all the comments and the support I have gotten from everyone! I can actually feel all the virtual (((hugs))) that were given right threw my computer. So I started searching the web and my blog roll for some sort of Saturday Meme that would be the easiest thing to do to just get something up.

In my blog roll I came across this one "Six Word Saturday" posted by Omni Times 4 , and I thought "I could do that". She got it from Show my Face where you can link up and check out what other's are saying about their lives in "Six Words". You can either use 6 separate words or a phrase that has 6 words in it. So I am just going to go for it. This week I am going to use 6 separate words......

"Christmas Decorating, Shoveling Snow, Laundry Laundry"

Bitchin' and Moanin'

( I am going to warn you now, this is going to be a curse filled rant about my Insane Life, so if you think you will be offended or don't want to hear me Ramble-on and BITCH then you better run now, cuz this is going to be a doosey)





I am not even sure where to start with all of my feelings. Over the last couple of days I have come across a few posts of bloggers feeling the same way, one even called it a "douching" of sorts. (ya know, clean it out and start again fresh) Maybe everyone is going through a "phase" is it a full moon or something?
So, first I will start with my husband...... he is a big-fat PAIN IN MY ASS!! Really he is just so miserable 80% of the time. I know he just had his neck surgery, and he can't help it (with being on enough pain meds to kill a herd of cow) but I have been dealing with this for years now, (he has been home, disabled for 7 years now). Not sure how much more of this I can take for my own sanity and for the well-being of my kids. It is harsh to say, I love him and all....but it really has taken a toll on me, our marriage and I believe my kids have missed-out on a lot. I do everything around here and to make matters worse he is a slob, hoarder so between him and his fucking bird they make more of a mess then me, Nick and Tom put together!! I daydream about how much easier my life would probably be if I was on my own with just the boys.
Then there is his whole family... his mother, father, brother and the 3 kids he has from his 1st marriage!! Ya know what, that is just tooo long of a story to go into now. I could write an entire BOOK on how much bullshit and agony each and everyone of them have caused me!! Let's just say they are ALL fucking losers and move on!
Sometimes I honestly can sit here and say I HATE my life there is soo much stress put on me by others and myself. I try so hard at being a mom, wife, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law, PTO vice-president and all around good person. But I feel like I SUCK soo bad all of them (oh, boy get out your violins.....I smell a "pity party" coming on) I feel lazy, fat, and stupid most of the time! If you are thinking "poor Tina" DON'T..... I am FAT (could stand to lose a good 75lbs) , I am LAZY (just take a look around my house and the piles of laundry not done) and STUPID. I can give you a perfect example of "stupid"... my 9yr old who is in 4th grade asked me what a shape was (he drew a picture of it on his white board) I told him "I don't know" he looked at me and started to tear up. So I said, "what, do you have a test today or something?" to which he responded "yes". Oh God, I felt like the biggest piece of SHIT, so I ran to my laptop and searched "shapes" and found the one he drew , ya know what it was ..........a FUCKING TRAPEZOID. I couldn't tell my 9yr old 4th grader what a trapezoid was! I cried when he left for school. When I don't understand what my 16yr old Junior in High School is talking about , I don't feel as dumb. He is a very very smart kid in all Honor classes, but to not be able to help your 4th grader out is just plain depressing!
My house is a disater, filled with clutter in every nook and crany..... I mean if you came over you would think by most standards it is "clean" but every drawer, closet, cabinet and nook is filled to the brim with SHIT. I feel like it is all suffocating me sometimes....but it is all so overwhelming you never know where to start. It is all a vicious cycle, maybe if I cleaned the clutter in my head, I could clean the physical clutter... or is it vice-a-versa??
I DON'T KNOW and if anyone out there has the answer or the "magic pill" I am open to all advice and donations of medication!
I am really a "happy-go-lucky" person.... well I used to be. I really feel like that person is still inside of me, but is sometime suppressed by all the stresses of LIFE. I am going to use this as a cleanse and try to move past it. Some of these things are out of my control and I have to just accept that, but what I really need to do is work on the things I can control and change.

So there it is.....my crappy life in a nutshell. Hope it wasn't tooo uncomfortable for ya!!

Going to get ready for a visit from my little grandson Tyler..... I know for a fact he can put a smile on my face!!
Thanks
xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

Gingerbread Houses at Grammy's

Every year my sister and I take the kids to my mom's so they can make their gingerbread houses. Now 3 of the 4 grand-kids are teenagers , we don't have many more years of this tradition. My Nick is 16 and he didn't want to do his this year

(ya know,he does have his driver's license and is a junior in High School)

It was sweet though , he sat with Thomas and helped him with the icing on his. They were being very goofy and laughing the whole time

( I am sure the sugar rush helped fuel the funnies)

Above is the house my sister and I did together

(cuz my son was just "too cool" to do one)

Below is Thomas' house

For more Wordless Wednesday posts check out 5 minutes for mom.

I guess, I really should label mine "Wordful Wednesday" even here, I talk too much!

Happy Hump Day

To Do Tuesday

Well I am not sure which week this is for me.... I really should go back and count, then number them like everyone else does. But then that would be one more thing added to my To Do Tuesday list and I have enough to do for now! I thought this was going to be an easy week, just a lot of the normal day-to-day stuff. But starting yesterday I realized this week was going to be just another one of those Insane weeks around here (like usual).

You can go check out all the other crazy list makers over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting . Lisa the head "Crazy" just got back from a long vacation.... I am just a little jealous (alright, A LOT jealous) I would give anything right now to get the HELL out of here!!

But I am stuck, making my freaking To Do Tuesday list...... so here it goes :

*Dinner menu for the week

*Grocery list and shop

*meeting at BOE tonight to meet the new Superintendent ( I need to at least pretend like I understand what the hell is going on there)

*go to my son's school on wed to send home some pto flyers ( I was already there yesterday morning doing the PTO bulletin board and going through our cabinet to see what left over stuff we have for our Holiday Store coming up in 2 weeks)

*buy some more Christmas gifts ( which it would be nice if I knew what to get, my kids are soo spoiled they don't really want/need anything)

*make sure Thomas has a nice outfit for Thurs'. "winter concert" at school: ( Thurs night will be the first time he plays his clarinet for a crowd ) gonna be tooo cute

*clean out some of the clutter in Thomas' room to make room for the new stuff.

*finish the Christmas decorations / put the fall decorating boxes back up in the attic

*Blog reading and writing

*pay bills

*work on the Holiday store schedule, (that is if any one of the parents who signed up to help out would return my email) also need to work on packaging some of the items for the store

Well that is it, I guess... along with the regular everyday cleaning, cooking and laundry that is ENOUGH !

Have a great week

Thanks

xoxo

I feel like a slacker

I haven't posted since Thanksgiving and I feel like quite the slacker........ It has been a crazy weekend, not in a "busy" way but in a "stressful" way. Having a lot of issues with the in-laws (what the HELL else is new) and I am really at the end of my rope with them and all the bullshit. My husband , I know is feeling very much "in the middle". Just like everyone else being married ( to a husband who is disabled , mind you) and raising 2 kids is not easy. I really don't feel like having the extra stress of being subjected to them and their "attitude" on a daily basis is fair to me or my kids..
We live in a side-by-side two family house and they live RIGHT NEXT DOOR...... let me give you a visual. If you have every seen the tv show "Everybody Loves Raymond" that would pretty much give you an idea of what my family life is like. My father-in-law is just as rude (even more-so) then the father Frank, my mother-in-law is a lot like Doris (just not as chipper as Doris can be, she is way more miserable). My brother-in-law is sort of the opposite of Robert (Robert is a cop) mine gets in trouble with the cops. But he is a big tall goof-ball that my MIL coddles like a 2 year old. My husband would be Ray, but his mother doesn't kiss his ass like Doris does Ray's and that would make me Deborah the only NORMAL one in the whole INSANE bunch!! UGH, I keep telling myself "one of these days, we will get the f-ck out of here" and I'm telling ya, it better happen SOON or I will not be responsible for my actions. LOL

Thanks
xoxo

Happy Thanksgiving

I wasn't going to do a Thanksgiving post, but I am awake and don't know what else I should do with myself right now! I should be cleaning, doing a last load of laundry or peeling potatoes but I haven't even finished my first cup of coffee yet.
My mother and brother are coming to my house this year, it is a first! As some of you know my husband had major neck surgery about a month ago and to put him in a car for an hour and a half drive to my sister's house would have been very uncomfortable for him. ( and me too.... I hate hearing him bitch about the drive to her house every year!) I will let you all know how this one turns out, I'm kinda nervous about the whole thing. Something usually always goes wrong when I have my family to my house. Over the summer we had a god awful sewer-type smell and my freakin father-in-law called the fire department. One other time my stove did some funky electrical thing (even though it is gas) and shorted itself out . I thought my ham and sweet potatoes were cooking and the oven wasn't even on!
Not starting this visit on a good note either, a mouse (well at least I hope it is a mouse) crawled into the wall somewhere in my bathroom and DIED!! groosssss , it is small bathroom with no window (only a vent fan , that is broken thank-you-very-much) so you can only imagine it stinks of dead rodent and apple cinnamon air freshener! I can hear through the very thin walls, my mother and father in law fighting! GREAT, they better shut their freakin mouths when my mother and brother get here!

I am going to stop my bitching and complaining now and say some things I am "Thankful" for..... *I am thankful for my family ( and by MY, I do mean MINE .... my in-laws can go suck an egg this Thanksgiving) oh, sorry that was a bitch and complain , won't do that again anymore I swear! LOL *I am thankful for my friends, I know I am not always the best friend in the world. But I am trying and wouldn't know where I would be with out each and everyone of them! *I am thankful I have 2 great kids they might drive me nuts sometimes, but I am very well aware I could have sooo much worse (considering my oldest is 16 and I know what my brother and I were doing at 16....yikes!)
I almost want to make wishes, but Thanksgiving isn't for that it is for being "thankful" for what you do have! So today I will be thankful for what I have and save the "wishes" for my birthday!

Have a very Happy Thanksgiving
Gobble , Gobble

Wordless Wednesday

My 9 year old son Thomas loves to "play" teacher....he has several white boards in his room. Lately he has been leaving me an "agenda" of to things to do every night (ummmm, wonder where the kid gets his obsession with list-making from??) usually the agenda consists of things like.... "I need a water bottle for school tomorrow", "sign my reading" or "don't forget cookie money". But Monday night's agenda simply read: "LOVE ME."

AWWWW....isn't that just the sweetest thing ever?? Who couldn't love that freakin kid?

For more "Wordless Wednesday" posts check out 5 Minutes for Mom.

To Do Tuesday

Well an other week has just come and gone..... This week has been a little nuts for me, for some crazy reason my mother has trusted ME to cook out Thanksgiving dinner. She is bringing the stuffing and sweet potatoes (which to me are the most important things anyway, so at least I won't screw those up) I have been cleaning and shopping like a crazy-person. I don't "do" formal get-togethers at all, it isn't my "thing".

Are you a crazy list-making nutjob like me and Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting? Then get over to her site link up and check out everyone else's To Do Tuesday Lists.

This week's List:

* Finish cleaning my house ( ya know, the "real" clean, the "company" clean....not the every day "spit and a prayer" kind of clean)

* Check out the Black Friday flyers ( I don't normally participate in this mayhem, but I figured if there is something for a good deal that is on my list, I might just go for it...... but don't expect me to shower if I'm getting up at the "crack-ass of dawn" )

* Mail out the ornaments from my Bloggers Ornament Exchange ( that really should have been done yesterday ....)

* Blog posts ( not sure I will get to that til this weekend)

* Take down Fall Decor and start putting up Christmas ( I will start that this weekend too)

* Try to enjoy Thanksgiving and not make myself too crazy over it:

* Last but not Least................ starting Sat it is "DIET-TIME" Holy Crap, I have been just the worse lately and really need to focus and do it!! I have got this damn Wii Fit sitting here on the floor 3 feet away from me that I clean the dust bunnies off of every week!!!

Have a Great Thanksgiving Everyone and let the insanity of the Christmas Season Begin.........

Thanks

xoxo

Anyone Have a Time Machine?

Today, my first born, my 16 year old son Nick is taking his Driver's License Test. I have been nervous and anxious, but today I am down right freaking out!! Wait, wait.... it was just yesterday that I was at the hospital for 28 hours of labor. Then before I knew it I was watching him ride the Kindergarten Bus and now he is a Junior in High School talking about College. With all the new laws here in Connecticut, he won't be able to drive with any of his friends in the car with him the first year. Whewww, that makes me feel a little better but it is the scariest thing I have had to do as a Mother so far.

I am so freaked out, that I really can't think of anything else to write, other then........... Does anyone have a time machine? If that is not possible I will take any donation of booze and Xanax!!

Wish him ( and me ) LUCK!!!

Thanks

xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

This is our bird "Chickie" ( well, really he is my husband's bird ) He goes everywhere with him and you can usually find him on my husband's shoulder or making a giant freakin mess in my house!

For more Wordless Wednesday posts go check out 5 Minutes for Mom.

To Do Tuesday

Holy Crap, it is Tuesday already?........ time is just flying by. Last week's list is all taken care of, I think it is hysterical that yesterday I checked it to make sure I did everything on there. ( As if, you all would be mad at me if I didn't get to something or that you would even know if I lied and said I did it all , when really I just sat here all week twiddling my thumbs) LOL But I did do it all ( well, maybe I "half-assed" cleaned my freezer, but I got it cleaned and somewhat organized and now I know what is in there).

So if you want to get in with the rest of us "obsessive compulsive" list makers , check out Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting to link up.

So this week is an other crazy week around here and have already done way too much, and it has only just begun. So here is my list:

*order corsage for my son's girlfriend ( he is having his Junior Dance Friday night, where he will be getting his very expensive "Class Ring")

*break down the rest of the cardboard boxes that we took out of my husband's mess of a hobby room (there is like 25 of them)

*Take back all the recycling ( soda cans and bottled water piles up around here, but at least this chore I get money back for doing)

*Get all the necessary paperwork together for my 16yr son's DRIVING TEST on Thursday. (**biting my nails...I don't even want to talk about this right now**)

* Bake for "Holiday Craft Night" at my youngest son's school on Thursday night ( yeah, have you figured out, Thursday is going to be one-fun-day) I also need to make signs, gather up trays, table clothes and some decorations.

*Try to buy a couple more Christmas gifts this week ( I did make my list last week, and actually bought a few things)

* Pay my cable bill (whooops , they called last night)

* Make grocery list/dinner list : This week I am planning on trying to live out of the freezer, we have so much in there. So hopefully my grocery list/bill will be small this week.

*Work on my PTO business ( I am the Vice President and am in charge of our Holiday Store coming up in December) Oriental Trading is my BFF right now!

* Blog designing, writing, reading and commenting ( I am a little frustrated with this whole thing right now, not feeling too much love lately. ) But I'm not giving up!

*Figure out a way to take/pay for a vacation next year: and not our regular Summer Beach Vacation with my family either. I am in desperate need of one and so is my husband and kids!!

Well, I think that is it for now..... I am sure I will be adding to it as the week goes on.

Have a great week!!

Thanks

xoxo

1st "Monday Mingle"... (sort of)

Good morning, I really wanted to get into this new blog carnival/meme (whatever you call it). I thought it was a cool idea when I saw Cheryl over at TheBudgeBunch.com do it a couple of weeks ago. It is the idea of Jennifer at Eighty MPH Mom. Go check her out and if want to do it too she has it so you can link-up and join in on the fun.

But this week I am not going to link up , because technically this is supposed to be a vlog and I am not feeling too hot today (let's face it anyway no one is going to see this regardless if I write it or vlog it, so what's the diff.)

Each week she has questions that she posts for you to answer in your vlog. So, here are this weeks questions:

1. Have you ever gone streaking or skinny dipping? HELL No, and I really don't think anyone would want to see that anyway!!!

2. If you could invite 5 people to dinner, who would it be? I thought and thought about this and I guess I could have picked 5 celebrities.... but I think I would want to have people that I have lost in my life (that passed away) like my brother Andrew, my old boyfriend from high school Joey, my Aunt Pat (mom's sister) , my Nana (my mom's grandmother) and then my 5th person would be my mom, cuz she would just have to be there to see all of them!!

3. Would you rather have X-ray vision or Bionic hearing? That is an easy one for me, "Bionic Hearing" for sure.......... I am sooo nosey and have to know everything!!! LOL

4. Do you tap your fingers from index finger to pinky or Vice / Versa ? I had to sit and do it to get this answer..... I do it from pinky to index finger. (can't do it the other way at all)

5. Would you rather stand 4'1" or 7'9"? An other easy one for me, I would rather be 4'1" . See I am about 5'7" and have been forever, always taller then my friends and pretty much everyone in school ......and I hated it!! Not to mention when you are short everyone always says "your cute"... I never was called "cute"!!

6. What is your favorite Thanksgiving dinner dish? Sweet potatoes, honestly it is all I really could have on my plate ( well maybe just a little turkey , cuz it's Thanksgiving and all) but SWEET POTATOES for sure!!!

Well that was fun, a bit lame cuz it wasn't a "vlog" but I did it anyway!!

Hopefully next week I will get off my pity-party-pot" and actually vlog my answers.

Thanks..

xoxo

My Office?

Ugh, as I sit here on a rainy Saturday in Ct..... I know I should be cleaning my house (ya know the one I am constantly bitchin' about being a mess?) If could just find the energy to do anything other then sit here in my chair with HGTV on in the background , computer on my lap, hanging out on Facebook, Twitter and the Blogosphere then I would do it!
Listen to me blaming my laziness on a lack of energy. It makes me feel less of a slacker and more like there is something medically wrong with me if I use the words "no energy" then "my fat ass doesn't feel like doing it today."

Back to the title of my post "My Office", my house is somewhat small and I don't have an extra room that could be "my office" (as if I am important and have a job~hahahaha~that's a joke).
So I am forced to use my coffee table as my make-shift desk/office. It isn't just any coffee table, it is one we got years ago, that the top rises up (sorry, I should have taken a pic of that fancy move). Then my husband modified it and put sides on it, so it would be somewhat enclosed. See I have a sick obsession with magazines and really don't like to part with them even after I've looked through them, so that gave me a place to hide them away. I even got some pretty baskets to contain them. (you see two baskets in the pic, but there are two more on the other side.) If I do nothing else today, it is going to be to organize and clean out my shit-hole of a coffee table / desk. I am hoping if I can accomplish this chore, it will make me better at finding important papers and bills when I need them. Now, if it could just make me have the money to actually pay all those bills that are piled up in there........that would be FREAKIN AWESOME!! But til that miracle happens , I will just be satisfied with a neat and organized coffee table or should I say "Office".
Thanks
xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

On Monday was my youngest son's 9th Birthday and I thought I would post pics from his 2 Birthday cakes!! The chalkboard cake we had at my mom's house on Sat. for his party with my family in New York. (Thomas loves to "play" teacher) The Spongebob cake we had at our house on Monday night with my husband's family. I can only take credit for baking the Spongebob one, my husband did the decorating on that one!! (he did a pretty good job for a neck brace wearing miserable pain in my ass!!) LOL

To check out some other great Wordless Wednesday pics check out 5 Minutes for Mom .

To Do Tuesday

Whew, am I glad that it is finally Tuesday!! Last week was an other "insane" week around here (hence, the new name change) Got through the Little Man's Birthday yesterday and feel like I can breath a little now. Hubby seems to be doing somewhat better, but still not where I thought he would be 2 weeks post surgery. Well, it is early and I am still quite exhausted from my week so I am just going to get right into my list!! Oh yeah, if you want to join in on the "To Do Tuesday" thing ..... go check out crazy Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting to see what she is up to , and to get all the info! * laundry (there is a mound of it calling my name) * clean out my freezers (that is the one thing I didn't get to from last week's list)* grocery list / shopping ( I have been really bad in this area lately, running to the store with only a list for a day or two worth of stuff, not being "on" with the coupons. but I did clean out my coupon thingy this weekend and cut out all the ones from the Sunday's paper already)* I guess I will start making my Christmas List / budget ( not sure how that is all going to work out , but if I at least make the list I will feel better)* work outside in the yard (not much for me to do out there, my father-in-law has hired some kid to do a lot and I have to say I am grateful for that!! whoo hooo)* catch up on Blog reading and commenting ( I really have been slacking the last couple of weeks on this and feel really bad, I miss you guys ) * continue to work on my blog layout/posts and finding someone to make me a custom header and button ( *ahem* any of you reading this that can do that sort of thing, leave a comment or DM me @Tina529) thanks * clean out my coffee table/office ( it is a wreck and soo disorganized) I think that is it for now, I am sure I am forgetting a whole bunch of other crap I should be doing but this a good enough start for me. Have a great week everyone and see you right back here next Tuesday!!

My Little Man Turns 9 Today

Today is my youngest son Thomas' 9th Birthday......... He was a bit of a "surprise" as you would call it. When I had my oldest son Nicholas, I thought to myself "that is it for me". I figured since my husband had 3 children from his first marriage, that I was totally fine with me only having to raise 1 child but he would still have siblings. (ya know, I figured "best of both worlds")
But then I guess there was a careless night in Feb of 2000, while we were living in New York (ooops) and about 5 weeks later I found out I was pregnant. Now at this point I had been married for about 5years, Nick was 7years old (yeah, yeah I know.......) and I really didn't know if I wanted to do this all over again. I love children don't get me wrong, but I had just settled into this job in New York and was moving up (granted it was an Orthopedics's Office). I had already gone from Receptionist, to Secretary and ended up downstairs away from the patients helping out the Bookkeeper. I know if I had stayed I would have been Office Manager, by the time I left in the Summer of 2000 there was 8 doctors and they were making plans to move the office to a bigger place and hire even more doctors. I really wrestled with the decision, I knew we would have to leave New York and move back to Connecticut. That was so hard, my family and friends are all there.
Here we are 9 years later and I would never change my decision. (believe me, there are a lot of decisions in my life I would change...but having Nicholas and Thomas are not two of them).

Thomas is really the sweetest kid you will ever meet, he does have his dark side though. He loves scary movies and has for a few years now. It is so crazy and creepy..... he once caught the movie "Child's Play" on the regular cable channel and he was hooked. I am sure he stopped and wanted to watch it because of the title, not realizing what the movie was about! LOL
He is a funny little kid too, he definitely has my sense of humor.....he keeps me laughing every day! He is not what you would call a "boy's boy" I would have to say he is more of a "mama's boy". (but that is fine with me) He loves to go outside and play (nothing in particular) just likes to run around like a crazy kid in any kind of weather. He plays with his Nintendo Ds, the computer, is into board games now, watches tv and "plays" teacher. He is hysterical, all he wants for his Birthday and Christmas is "teacher" supplies. (for God sakes his favorite store is Staples). I am assuming he is going to be a Teacher when he grows up!
Well, I hope you get a sense of my "little man" there is way more to him, but I acutally have to go wake his butt up for school. I posted just a few recent pics, it has been too crazy for my to go dig out baby pics and upload them.
Thanks
xoxo

New Name and Layout

Ok, I have been working on my blog all weekend....I am still not done, but I wanted you all to know that I decided to change the name. I never really cared for "Tales from Tina" so changed it to "Tina's Insane Life". It better describes me and my life, it is so freakin insane at times it is almost unbelievable!! I will try to get more into some of the crap that goes on, but I also get a little uncomfortable opening up that much. I don't want to come off like a lunatic, but really it is the people around me that are the real lunatics!! I seem to be a magnet for all the loonies!! So sit back and enjoy the ride..........
I will take all comments good and bad, and if there is anyone out there who does backgrounds or can easily work through all the HTML code, I could use all the help I can get.

Thanks again
xoxo

New Blog Layout

I am working on a new blog layout/template. So if you stop by and are thinking WTF, where am I?? Don't go, it is still me, Tina!! I have been wanting to do this for a long time and tonight I took the plunge. It might change again and possibly a new name too. ooooooh, it is sooo scary to me!! Bare with me, as I try to figure this all out. I will take all opinions , criticisms or ideas.
Thanks ....
xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

My Thomas' Favorite Holiday of The Year!!

Watch out Michael Myers is in the House!!

For more Wordless Wednesday check out 5 Minutes for Mom

To Do Tuesday

Ok, well last week was a total "wash" ......so this week's list is super long and I guess I will be happy if I can do half of what's on it!! Unfortunately, I am not going to have any Christmas talk on my list this week, unlike the crazy/supermom Lisa over at Crazy Adventures in Parenting who I so want to "BE"! She not only has Christmas Lists going she is in full-blown shopping mode. WTF, way to make me feel like a slacker!! LOL
If you want in on this "To Do Tuesday" or just go check out her "Crazy Adventures" go ahead, I dare ya!!

Here goes "The List From Hell" (why not, goes with my "Week from Hell")

* Haircuts for me and my two sons
* Oil Change in my truck (yeah, to me that is a "man's" job, but I am the "man of the house" now)
* pay bills/check my bank account balance (that should be pretty pathetic)
* Do coupons/grocery list/dinner list
* Take back all the recycling that has piled up in the back of my truck (yikes, this is going to take forever, I haven't done it in a couple weeks and we go through a lot of soda) I almost can't see out the review mirror , so that is how I know it is TIME
* clean both my freezers (they are sooo gross , it isn't even funny)
* clean out my coffee table (AKA , my "office") oooh, that is soo going to be a "post" one of these days.
* clean my shower/bathtub (that is about as nasty as the freezers)
* plan/buy gifts for my son's 9th Birthday (which is next Mondy, Holy Crap....I better get my ass in gear on this one!!)
* clean out my son's room/closet (to make room for the Birthday/Christmas gifts that are going to flood the house soon) oooooh, I mentioned Christmas!!!
* Almost forgot one, I must catch up on my blog reading and commenting ( I feel so bad, and really miss it!) sorry everyone, I will make my rounds this week!!

Well ya know what , that is it for now.......... I am getting tired just making this friggin list!!
Wish me Luck, I am going to need it!!
Thanks
xoxo

The Week From HELL....

Last week was honestly "The Week from HELL"..... My husband had his 2 part neck surgery Monday and Tuesday. I brought him home from the hospital on Wednesday evening. I cannot even describe how shitty the last 7 days have been!! First we will start off with the fact that I myself have been sick with a sinus infection/post nasal drip/bronchitis for the last 10 days (still feel like crap today, by the way) My husband had a similar neck fusion surgery a few years back and I don't know if he just got through that one easier or my mind blocked-out how horrific the post-surgery really was or what......... but this time really, really SUCKS!
Of course, like everything else I do for my family I do all by myself even though my mother-in-law lives right next door!! I know she has her own set of stresses with my father-in-law's health issues, but come-on!! He is your freakin son ... I know that if I went through even a 1/4 of what my husband is going through my mom would be right here to help him and me through it!! My mom has offered to come up from New York and help cook and just "be" with me, but I had to tell her "no". Since I am sick, I really don't want to risk her getting sick. My mom is a very healthy woman, but for some reason if she even gets a minor cold it ALWAYS turns into pneumonia.
I am so upset that all this chaos has also made Halloween Day not the best it could have been!! I was very stressed out that day, running around bringing Thomas to a Halloween party, running errand for everything my husband wanted to help make him more comfortable, 2 trips to Walgreens Pharmacy (yeah, DON'T ASK...) The night before he had a muscle spasm in his neck for 4 HOURS (from 4am-8am)!!!! Yeah, that was fun...let me tell you!!
Then the kicker......the cherry on top, was when right before I alone was going to take my 8yr old son out trick-or-treating I had made a comment to my mother-in-law that my house was a "wreck" and it was driving me crazy!! Ya know what her response was??......... "yeah, huh"
WTF, are you kidding me BITCH? So after I got home with Thomas, I sat down for a little while and then at about Midnight I decided it was time for me to start cleaning!! Oh, I ran my washing machine and dryer, I also ran my dishwasher. I was not gentle moving stuff around while straightening out my pantry (the back of that wall is right where they sleep)! She is lucky I didn't pull out my vacuum and start doing the whole house at 12:30am, cuz everyone over here was still awake!!!
Well that is enough of my "Bitch-fest"....hoping this week it gets a little better. My Thomas turns 9 one week from today and I really want it to be a special day for him!!
So, I am going to take a "deep-breath" and try to make it the best birthday week possible!!
Thanks
xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

My 3 1/2 month old grandson Tyler smiling and laughing away!

To-Do Tuesday

My week has gotten off on a "not-so-good-start".....my husband had part one of his emergency neck surgery yesterday afternoon and let just say we didn't have a good night!! It is a very long story and I will explain in another post when I have time. He is having part two of the surgery right now and I am not looking forward to this afternoon. I can't believe those bastards are still considering sending him home to me tomorrow!! It is just CRAZY!!

Back to my To-Do Tuesday list.... I had it all made out this weekend, and I really don't know what the hell I was thinking!! I will be lucky if I can take a SHOWER this week!!
I did make it through last week (barely) but the Bake Sale and Book Fair were a success and that is all that matters. If I do get anything accomplished on the list I did make for myself I will let you know next week. This week's list is going to consist of this"

1. Take care of my husband
2. Take care of my kids
3. Get through this week without killing #1 or #2 !!

Sorry ,
xoxo

My First Ever, Blog Award

Thanks to Kirsten @ Kirsten Not Kristen for this Award. It is the first one I have ever received and am very honored. In giving this Award to me, it of course has some "strings" . First I have to tell you all 10 Honest Things about myself and then pass it on to 7 other bloggers.
So here it goes.........

Ten Honest Things About Me

1. At 39 years old I still call my mom, "mommy"

2. I would much rather spend money on my house (decorating items, etc) then on clothes for myself. (hence, my need to be on "What not to Wear".)

3. I am a chronic dieter.... I am not good at it, just always seem to be on one!!

4. I really want to get a tattoo for my 40th birthday, and sooo don't want to chicken-out.

5. I really want to go back to school, but need to find the courage and self confidence first.

6. I like things neat and organized....but for the Love of God, don't open a closet or drawer!

7. I still feel very "immature" wish I was wiser, ya know one of those "smart" people you always go to for advice.

8. I have a "thing" about Goofey (from Mickey Mouse) it must be something from my chilhood. He must have scared the crap out of me on a trip to Disney World when I was 5.

9. My husband and I have no real relastionship or contact with 2 of his 3 children from his first marriage. It is not something I am proud of , but thought since we are being "honest" I would put it out there!

10. Last but not least.... I am very proud to say I still have the same set of girlfriends from Elementary/Middle/High School. Thanks to Facebook have caught up with a few others and when we get together it is like not a day has passed. This is not to say that I am not just as grateful or proud of my other friendships (old and new). I LOVE all of my friends and wouldn't know what to do without any of them!!

So now I am "passing the buck" onto to these fellow bloggers who I feel are not only "honest" but also consider "friends". Thanks, I look forward to all of your lists!!

1. Cheryl @ The Budge Bunch (one of my real-life BFF's)

2. Bobbi @ When did I go from a kid to grown-up ( one of my 1st blog followers who wasn't a "real life friend)

3. Robin @ Mass Hole Mommy ( just started and wow, she is great! great supporter too)

4. Kim @ Diary of a Wicked Step Mom ( ahhh, a CT step-mom just like me)

5. Tina and Amy @ Bloob ( ok, freakin hysterical!! )

6. Gennifer @ Gennifer with a G ( a real life BFF from "back in the day")

7. Ry @ For the Birds ( honest and always right there, great supporter)

Wordless Wednesday

Ok, not sure why I can't get my "act" together lately for Wordless Wednesday..... I seem to forget to think about it on Tuesday. (Should put that on my To-Do Tuesday list) duh!

This picture is of my girlfriend Jen and I from the beginning of the month, her 39th birthday was Oct. 5th. She is the youngest of my group of girlfriends that I have had since elementary/middle school. Paulanna already turned 40 in July, Laura will be in January and then for me the "big one" is in May. We all got together for lunch like we always do for each other's birthdays. We laugh (very loud, I have to admit) and this time even cried a little.

Thanks
xoxo

To-Do Tuesday

I am trying this new blog carnival sponsored by Crazy Adventures in Parenting. While doing my regular blog reading last week, Bobbi at When did I go from a Kid to a Grown-Up had done this for the first time. I love the idea of "lists" I write one everyday, sometimes I do everything on it and sometimes NOT. So, I figured I would join in and give this a try.

Tuesday: *Help out at my son's school Book Fair (9am- ??)
*Pay my Best Buy, Car Insurance and Car payment
*Laundry (that is a "given" everyday)
*Make my dinner list for the rest of the week

Wednesday: *Bake for my son's School's Bake Sale on Thursday night (brownies, cupcakes and going to attempt to make some Carmel apples)
*Make signs for Bake Sale
*Keep looking for the right blog template and background for this blog (I want a change)

Thursday: *Again help at the Book Fair (from 9am- ??)
Thursday night: *Go to /Help out at the School's Pumpkin Decorating Event/Bake Sale

Friday: *Will probably have to catch-up on all my house chores and errands
*Start working on my own Christmas list (just to jot down names, ideas and make a budget)
*Need to start making a list of items to buy for the School's Holiday Store ( I am "in-charge" of that this year, lucky me huh?)
Saturday/Sunday: *catch up on all blog reading/hop around and find new ones
*work on my other website (about my town/city)
*get our pumpkins and carve them
*weather permitting do a Haunted House or Hayride or something like that
I did see an ad for a Haunted Mini Golf place a few towns over, would love to do that.

I am sure I left out a bunch of other things I am supposed to do this week.
Alot with my son's school, because this is my first year as the PTO Vice President and of course I don't ever say NO!

Thanks
xoxoxo

Sometimes Life Just Plain SUCKS.....

I am writing this post now, because I am not sure what next week is going to bring.. If you don't know already my husband is disabled and has been for the last 7 years. He was working in NYC in July of 2002 and was in a minor car accident. Ever since that day our lives have not been the same, he wound up having to have 2 neck surgeries still waiting approval on a back surgery all the while fighting with Worker's Compensation. Seriously gotten the point where my feelings about them is they can just "BITE ME".
As if all of this isn't bad enough, we just found out last week that he has to have yet another neck surgery. But this one is an EMERGENCY, he had a cat scan done about 1 month ago and because of a life threatening heart attack his father had while on vacation in Canada, my husband never had the follow up appointment with his doctor until this week. According to the doctor, the C1 and C2 are herniated to the point they are protruding into his spinal cord by about 50%. He told him that one wrong move and he could end up like Christopher Reeves (paralyzed and on a respirator ) Nice, huh??
Last night he had an MRI the doctor ordered to make sure that the cat scan results are correct and we should know Monday or Tuesday by the latest when this "emergency" surgery will happen. So once again, everything in my life is on "hold" while we deal with this. This is not what I thought my life was going to be at age 39, but it is and you do what you have to do!! ( I guess, right?) Ugh, hopefully I will be able to get through this one with my mind still intact and my husband still in one "moving" piece.
Thanks
xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

My 16 year old son, Nick.....with his Nephew Tyler.
Still not used to the fact my kids are uncles.....

I Created a Monster......

Ok, I know this might sound nuts to some of you......but every year I decorate my son Thomas' room for Halloween. It is by far his favorite holiday, might actually even tie with Christmas! He is 8yrs old (will turn 9 in November) and is obsessed with scary movies and has been for a few years now! It all started with Chucky from Child's Play, he caught it one day on tv. I think when he saw the title of the movie was "Child's Play" he assumed it was a movie for children. NOT

I used to worry about him and his fascination with these movies and the characters, but Thomas also has this other side to him. He is really the sweetest kid (and that is not just his mom saying it).
This is the 3rd or 4th year I have decorated his room. I don't make it creepy, it is mostly crap from the Dollar Store , Walmart and places like that. I have been a little busy and lazy lately, if that even makes any sense. He has been bugging me for the last week and a half to get down his Halloween box out of the attic and decorate his room. So I finally got my butt in gear this weekend and got the box down and did it. Really, it was to shut him up.....my mom has always said to me "you are the one who created that monster". I enjoy doing it and making him happy. I also do this for Christmas, so you will have to stay tuned to see the "Winter Wonderland" that I create!
Thanks
xoxo

Wow, He Actually Remembers How to Cook...

It is a crappy, cold, rainy Saturday here in Connecticut, ya know one of those days where you take a shower but put back on your PJ's. (well ,that is what I did today anyway!)
Right now I am sitting in my livingroom and can smell dinner cooking in the kitchen. I am sure you are wondering when is she going to get to the point of this post....well it is coming!!
My husband is the one in the kitchen cooking dinner, NOT ME!! I can't even tell you the last time he cooked dinner for us.
See, 7yrs ago he was working on a job in New York City (he was in the Audio/Visual industry) when a Livery Cab re-ended him. I know that doesn't sound like a big deal, but my life hasn't been the same since that day. He knew he got hurt, but didn't go to the hospital or anything. We thought he just had whip-lash or something and he would be fine in a few days. Well, long long long story short and 2 neck surgeries later he is totally disabled at age 44. Over the years I have taken on doing everything around the house. He does have his "good" days and does some projects around the house. But honestly, it is the little jobs that I miss having him help me with. For example: taking out the garbage, doing a load of laundry, cooking dinner. So when he asked me to pick up the fixings to make beef stew yesterday, and that he was going to make it I thought to myself ("great, I am going to have to cook beef stew and I don't even like it") My boys have been on a "kick" lately and love that nasty Dinty Moore Beef Stew in a can....dont' ask where they got it from, I don't like it homemade never mind eating it out of a can!! GROSSSSS.
So, he is in there cooking away making a giant mess that I will have clean up later-on!! Unfortunetly, I don't like beef stew and will probably make myself an english muffin pizza!! But, I am sure my kids are glad he still remembers how to cook!!

New Year's Resolutions

You must be thinking, "is it January?"............ I am either very very late, or super early but I decided that I need to make some New Year's Resolutions. I'll be honest, not sure if I can actually stick with them because I'm usually "all talk and no action". I am hoping that writing it all down will help with me staying true to the list. So here is goes..........

1. The good ol' standby of losing weight, exercise and eating healthier. This one is honestly the HARDEST one. I want it so bad, but I am such and emotional eater. I eat when I'm happy, sad, stressed, bored, celebrating and oh yeah sometimes when I am actually hungry!!

2. Go back to school, or take some sort of classes to better myself. I have been talking about this for years. I didn't go to college (well, technically I went for 3 weeks and then dropped out) and now that my son is a Junior in High School, we have been talking about college for him and it makes me feel STUPID. This is the SCARIEST one, not easy being a 40 year old Freshman!

3. Be a better mom ...... there is a big difference between being their "maid" and being their "mother". My mom is always telling me that my son's wives are going to HATE me!! This one is the EASIEST one, that means less for me to do!! yee-ha

4. Work on myself ..... I need to learn the tools to actually accomplish the first 3 things on this list, even at 39 (pushing 40) I need to do some growing up. I am way too hard on myself, take things people say or do way too personal. I get defensive when it is not necessary and don't stick up for myself when I should. This one is the HARDEST and the SCARIEST but really should be the EASIEST.

So thanks for listening to my New Year's Resolutions and I hope that by tomorrow I don't forget about them again!!
xoxo